he tastes like you even sweeter….
This weekend I was haunted by many ghosts from my past. I kept bumping into them left, right and centre. In one particular case, I was sort of a catalyst, add alcohol into the mix (not by me) and the situation became even funnier.
Bumping into my exes or having any contact with them is never easy. It takes a lot of effort to ignore them and act like I haven’t seen them. Yes, sadly that is the relationship that I have with them. I am not the sort of person who is into ‘beef’ with people. In fact, every time I always tell myself to be the bigger person and say hello or something, but I always chicken out because I am afraid interacting with them will just make me feel bad.
This fear has been reinforced by my past experiences with one of the exes smh. Seeing him is always disorienting, the fact that he moved on so fast never helps matters. He always makes me feel inadequate, like I was never good enough. We cannot be friends if you do not even like the person that I am!
As for another ex, even though he really hurt me, I was over that story since it happened some 3 or 4 years ago. I was even ready and willing to be friends. Till he called me and told me a big bunch of hogwarsh, and all that flew out of the window. The fact that he has discovered my value now really does not count for anything. You snooze you loose my friend!
Then there was another guy who I keep meeting every week
grrrrrrr but all we do is ignore each others existence. Well, I was forced to talk to him at blankets where all of your exes converge in one garden and the dude acted like he had never met me before!! I went along with it, simply because I don’t really give a damn about him smh.
Sometimes I wonder what I was thinking getting into these relationships, and why I had to go through them. I understand that such experiences are learning lessons or whatever, but I am so tired of getting it wrong. I need to get it right.
I do thank the men who have been in my life for showing me that I deserve better, and the traits that I should avoid in my future boyfriends.
There are also those characters who give me cheap thrills, and this is what I think of them>>>
Here’s hoping I do get it right…….