Our debut guest post comes from Sam Buggz, I follow him on twitter (@Buggz79) and he usually has the most hilarious tweets. Visit his blog Buggin Out and delve into the mind of a 30- something year old father of one 🙂
Sober. In Nairobi. On the weekend.
I’m hanging up my beer goggles.
I think I’m done with drinking. It’s been a good run. About a decade and a half of various intoxicating agents (alcohol mostly) taken regularly twice a week. Thanks to this magic elixir, I have proposed to two different women, on the same night. End result: woke up in an unfamiliar location sans trousers but still in socks and shoes.
On another occasion, I provided endless amusement for my daughter who enjoyed re-enacting my escapades around the house the previous night in great detail…at my in-laws.
“Papa alikunya fobe…alafu aka aanza kuanguka na kucheka cheka…”
It was a very long afternoon that one…
But the primary reason I’m done with booze, young mimics aside, is this: It has lost novelty.
Back then, there was the peer pressure, do it with your boys…especially when rugby season was on. There is something about youth that gives you thoughts of invincibility..heck you were even hang’id with pride. Random fights, chasing the girls with short dresses and even shorter attention spans. When you do that in a crowd charged with cheap liquor and testosterone, you feel invincible.
But as you get older…the little things start to bug you. The music is too loud or worse yet, you don’t get it. (“Pretty boy swag…Heeeeyyyy”…aaaarg! Kill me now).
And then you realize the true poverty that’s in Kenya…all these poor young souls in ill-fitting clothes…girls in tiny slips 3 sizes too small..such that spillage actually occurs. The young men have badly tailored trousers that seeming only go up an inch above their knees. It breaks my heart to see them attempt to run…chicks with tiny mincing steps like those Chinese ladies with bound feet. The gents fare no better..running with the speed and grace of intoxicated penguins.
But I digress…
What options are available to the typical Nairobian when they eschew alcohol?
Well, here is a list, by no means comprehensive, of what else you can get up to.
As a crowd:
Bowl (I have issues wearing other people’s shoes..yuk),
Mini golf (useless after 6 pm) and
Shoot pool (normally in bars..which kinda defeats the purpose)
Couples and Team solo:
Movie (chick flick death resides here. Incidentally..theaters are really empty on Friday evenings…just so you know.),
Cook (not omelets! Something challenging..and no…”Omlette du frommage” is STILL not fancy),
Church stuff (Hey…some people do get a kick out of this)
Coffee dates (Meh..i could do with some new settings)
Random events: (Insert play/concert/book club/Near death experience here)
Camp out (Camping out is awesome..especially how safari ants liberate you to strip in front of ANYONE with no shame)
So…the gap that the booze will leave in my life from a time perspective does seem daunting…but I’m ready for a new set of sober experiences.
Share your sober fun plans in the comments below.