My month has not been very hot as you may have noticed, last week especially sucked for me, I do not know how this week will go, or next week…
Anyway I have been forced to become even more pessimistic than usual because I keep getting my hopes up, even though I tell myself not to, and I get disappointed and it feels soo bad 😦 I am trying to get over that terrible feeling, but it is very hard, especially if it is a person who has disappointed me.
By nature I am not someone who holds grudges, life is too short to spend it hating someone or being mad at someone.
So this weekend, I realised I am not the only person who has their guard up because of fear of disappointment. I came face to face with that ‘guard’ and at first it felt like being ignored, rejection, and then I finally got an explanation.
The fact that someone is scared that I would disappoint them is surprising, kinda shocking and it doesn’t feel too good. I honestly try my best not to disappoint others, knowing how much that feeling sucks.
The question is, should I do something to prove that there is no need to have that guard put up in place? should I just give up because that guard is like really way up high?? The fact there is a guard is disappointing in itself, I never expected that at all.
What I am learning from this is that maybe I should not lose hope in having hope in people now that I know how the shoe fits on the other side, so I will try somehow not to loose hope in hope.
I also hope that guard goes down…one day…
Dear Lord I pray for a great week, filled with lots of joy and happiness, new opportunities, for sure I guarantee there will be tears, but just to usher in the start of a new journey. I pray for strength, wisdom, and courage to overcome everything that is thrown my way.
Have a blessed week 🙂
xxx V xxx